Every day, for the past 100 days, I've opened FB and been greeted with MrsN's #100happydays daily instalment. She chose to count up to 100 (and not down).
I was under the impression she was doing it as she and her family were repatriating after many years as expats. That it was a way to find ONE HAPPY THING to keep her going as there are such mixed emotions swirling around one's head when embarking on this kind of move.
Along with all her FB friends looked forward to discovering what made her happy the past 254 hours, and loved her words and the images she posted to accompany them.
On several occasions I commented what an incredible memory book the #100happydays would make.
MrsN has ALWAYS seen the good in everyone and everything around her. I've never heard a sour word come from her mouth, or her fingertips on FB. She's no Goody Two-Shoes, but she is genuinely one of the happiest, sincerest, kindest, selfless people I have ever met. Sure, we've had some very deep'n'meaningful chats, and shared some pretty low points (we've all had them).
We met at a lunch that neither of us really wanted to be at - how funny is that? We started talking, and haven't stopped since. Our talking has been replaced with FB chatter, and emails until we meet up again in person.
Sadly for all of us who followed her on FB, her #100dayshappy has come to an 'end'. How sad am I, and others who wanted it to go on and on. Just ONE MORE instalment. PLEASE.
Each of her #100dayshappy made me happy. We were all living vicariously thru her experiences and observations.
I started to think, could I do this?
Could I genuinely find one thing each day that made me HAPPY? Could I open myself on FB like that, every single day? Heck, the latest fad of 3 days sharing 3 things you are grateful for was hard enough. How deep'n'meaningful and I prepared to get if I use FB as my vehicle, or should I start another blog and hope you join me ... does that defeat the purpose?
Do you think it's odd to be cautious about sharing happiness - surely it shouldn't be. it's much nicer to share happiness than sadness!
Would people take it as being egotistical?
Would people pass judgement?
Would people care?
What if no one commented under each day? (I know at least MrsN would)
Would people think you're making it up - life isn't always 'happy'
Would you make others feel less happy by sharing you're happiness?
Would your happiness encourage others to do the same, like MrsN has done?
Are you happy??????????
Are you that outgoing?
Could you share your most inner secrets?
How good an observer of life are you?
What's made you HAPPY this week? I'll share with you what's made me HAPPY this week.
- Monday: MissM willingly went to try out tennis and has enjoyed it. The happiness for me is she's discovered something that's social and is played around the world. No matter where we are, if she can play tennis she'll be able to join a club and make a friend. It's just one more thing she can add to her hobbies and interests as we roam the world.
- Tuesday: Happy to be using my skills and experience as VP of IWCD as I'm in a position to give back to the Club that's been so kind to me.
- Wednesday: HAPPY while making Mums chicken soup for MissM and the lovely feeling the aroma gave me. It's a recipe that's not written down, but somehow through watching Mum make it all these years, I've worked out how.
- Thursday: Feeling very fortunate that a member of the IWCD offered her BBQ 'for free' to anyone who would like it, and I was first to say 'yes please'. Happy that we've finally got a BBQ!
- Tomorrow I can write 'Happy to have got to the gym every single day this past week.
Mine are so ordinary compared to MrsN's - have I missed the point? Is there more going on around me I'm missing? Have I fallen into the trap of comparing lives? Will I get better at reaching deeper, being more open as the days go by?
MrsN reads ms-havachat, so I'm curious, as I'm sure you are for her comments below even tho I have an inkling of what encouraging, kind, motivating words she'll write and how humbled she'll be that she inspired todays chat.
Was MrsN able to do this because she was living in Yokohama and life there is just, well, different? Is it because she and her family were so involved in the local community with volunteer work that there was real happy stuff going on around her to write about? Or, is expat life in a non-English speaking country, and therefore a small tight knitted community the essence of happiness? Knowing her, she'll be well able to find another #100happydays in her repatriation, as hard as it might be. She has an inner strength to look past stuff and find good.
I've a friend whose mum who floats thru life. Nothing is ever a bother, everything is a party (even a memorial service for a family member who passed away after a long illness - she thought it was lovely to have a party and catch up with friends and reminisce), everyone and everything is lovely. She's very sweet, and I wish I could be like her cos let's face it, life isn't always like that.
But if we CHOSE to focus on the good, maybe the not-so-good wouldn't be as bad?
Do we really need to experience the lows to get the highs?
We learn about opposites young in life, and some of us evolved into understanding the ying and yang of life ........... so does just focusing on the happy stuff negate the other?
Apparently, there's a world wide movement of #100dayshappy. Check out their website.
With all the crap going on these last few weeks, it might do us all good to join the revolution.
Will you join me in #100happydays?
What platform will you share it on?
Do you even need to share it? Can you simply write in a diary and look back?
With friendship
x
For me, at least, happiness is about the little everyday things that make up the fabric of your life, the quiet cup of coffee after school drop off, the way the sun shines through the leaves, hearing a certain song, the smell of freshly baking bread, nesting at home or catching up with a friend over a coffee. It is the ordinary that makes up most of our lives and it is finding the happiness in the ordinary that makes it work for me. India Knight published a not so great book about thrift, but she has a chapter at the end on emotional thrift that resonates so strongly with me, maybe find the book in your library and just read the last chapter.
ReplyDeleteYou're so right Kristin - certain songs can make you smile (or cry) with the opening few bars; a kind word from a friend, an unexpected email/skype; the kids ........ I'll try to find the book you mentioned and have a peek.
Deletex
I did the 100 days of happiness thing. But privately. It's my life and my things that are personal to me and felt too personal to be sharing every single one of them. I've also kept a gratitude diary for a long time, just 5 things I'm grateful for each day - a cuddle with charlotte, G bringing me a cup of tea in bed etc, simple stuff that is worth being grateful, very personal.
DeleteWe're all grateful for the simple things in life ... and most of them are very personal. That's why MrsN's was so inspiring - there were some very personal moment shared. MrsH has kept a diary for years!!!!!! I had one once - mum found it, read it, discussed it with my aunt for advice on what to do about some of the things she'd read, then talked to me about it. Never written one since. Guess that's why she (and others close to me) don't know about ms-havachat LOL.
DeleteI'd like to give the #100happydays thing a go - but like you, will do it privately and maybe hidden on my laptop xo