ms havachat and the quest for creative, online photo albums

Do you leave them on your phone? WHY???????????

Do you upload them to your laptop and have them play in an endless cycle when the laptop is in sleep mode? WHY?????

Do you have them printed and make photo albums?

Do you create on line albums?

I used to make photo albums with real photos. I'd design the page layouts, and create headings, have the photo's developed then sort them out into chronological order before placing them into the albums to be admired and appreciated for years to come.

Then I switched to making them online - cheaper, quicker, more creative options, fabulous coffee table quality.

Then, the online company I was using decided to no longer be compatible with Apple (or maybe my new MacBook Air is the issue) either way I haven't made an album for quite a few YEARS and I'm freaking out.

This hasn't happened overnight.

I've been looking for what seems to be ages for a replacement online photo album company, but none of them seem to have the range of things the one I was using had - and I would love so much to be able to have it all again.

About 4 years ago, I used a different company as a comparison and didn't like the result. The quality of paper was different, there was no option for a flat-spine, so the perfect-bound spine is all cracking and you can't open the book flat to see the entire photograph.

We've done several holidays since, and all the photos are sitting on the laptop waiting to be made into albums.

I guess my issue is simply, I am years behind in my photo albums which is simply not like me at all and I'm wondering does it matter?

No one's asked to see them photos.

No one's gone looking for the memories.

Maybe one day they will ....... or not.

I believed taking the photos and creating the albums was important family documentation. One day, I won't remember or I'll be gone and MissM will go to the album, relive the memory because I spent time writing the story of the photograph for prosperity. She'll be overcome with emotions - happy ones I hope (cos who puts sad photos into albums?) and her expat kid life will be there is a pictorial diary, readily available.

Which house?

What year did we go to (insert place) for holidays?

Where were we when (Insert visitors name) did (????)

In grade 3, my friends were ..............

At (insert school) I went on (insert field trip)

I turned (insert birthday) (insert house)

The list goes on.

We're all so caught up in taking photos on our phones and uploading them to social media - has this replaced the urgency and desire to have them printed and seen in albums? We can create online albums on our FB pages, give it a title, and add pics any time.

Random FB photo page found on Google Images.

When we travel, we have the photos on our phones plus the ones on the 'big camera' (which I have to admit we don't always take with us anymore cos the phone camera's are so good). Is the impetus to 'see' the pics removed because we've commented and shared them already?

Camera phones are so convenient and the technology is great!

A friend, who is single and has no kids does not take photos. She travels A LOT and has been to many amazing places and still does not take photos. WHY, she asks me? They are 'my' memories and I'll remember them. No one wants to have to clean out decades of memories.

I have always thought that's sad.

Maybe that's the case with us.

Maybe, deep down, MissM doesn't want the albums either.

Maybe my not being able to find a reliable, creative online album company is a message that I'm to not bother.

On days like today, when I'm home with nothing specific to do, I know I could very simply work on the albums. Then I get stressed to the max trying to make them work ...... then give up (which so isn't in my DNA).

Maybe when the MacBook Air dies, I'll make sure my next laptop is compatible with the online software I prefer then I'll spend months going back over years of photos filed away, creating albums.

Gosh I hope I remember where we were!

With friendship

x

ms-havacaht loves The Amazing Race but not for reasons you might think.

We LOVE The Amazing Race in our house.

Do you know it? Do you watch it? What do you think?

HUGE shout out to MrsH for recommending it to me a few months ago!

We have come to the popular TV show years after it started (it's in the 28th season) but that's ok. Timing works in mysterious ways and the timing for us is perfect (explain in a sec)

Launched in 2001 on American TV channel, CBS, the global franchise is now filmed in 13 countries.

The gist of each show is simple. Eleven couples (any combination of relationship) race around the world. At each destination teams compete in various challenges (mental, physical) based on a set of instructions. When they complete each challenge to the satisfaction of a 'judge', they learn their next challenge or destination. The last team to 'check in' at the end of the leg 'may be eliminated'.

There are twists and turns which make it interesting too.

The winning team of each leg wins a prize.

Obviously, the last team standing wins; and they win the $US1million.


So, why are we hooked?

The travel component of the show is amazing. They go to incredible countries and as a result of the challenges, you see unique places that might make it onto a to-do list if you were to visit the place. It's enjoyable when they go to a city you've experienced (been there, saw that, remember that)

There's geography based conversations - Where is it? What's it near? Landscapes. Farming. MissM's favourite is 'do we know anyone from there'. Excellent opportunities to get out the atlas (yes, we have an atlas in the house, don't you?. G reaches for his phone to Google while I encourage the book)

Food, music, culture - wow! Thank goodness we are all so different! Tho some of the food we can definitely give a miss (dried python was the most recent WT? moment)

We won't complain about peak hour traffic anymore now we've seen it in other parts of the world.

Helps add to the ever growing bucket list, which is more of a wish list these days as places are added far more quickly than they are removed due to being experienced.


The huge lessons (unknowingly) learnt each and every episode are the ones to do with the teams, and with Exhibition (read blog here) happening this term at school, the timing is perfect!

In grownup terms it's things like:

• Successful teams are based on communication, support, encouragement, empathy, compassion, respect, honesty, the various roles people play, acknowledging everyones strengths and weaknesses and using them appropriately etc.
• Karma is a bitch (tho we've changed the phrase for MissM's ears)
• Paying it forward is good for the soul. 
• Challenging yourself beyond what is comfortable is tricky and very rewarding.
• Learning things about yourself (good or bad) is beneficial.
• Setting goals and aspiring for success is good.

MissM's ability to see what's working and not working in the teams is incredible. MrsH, you were right (not that I ever doubted you) The show is a fantastic teaching tool and the kids have no idea!

• If only they read ALL the instructions before rushing off they'd know what to do.
• Ugh, why did they take a taxi when they were told to walk.
• They lied to get ahead and now they are in last place. Serves them right. 
• WOW, they did the challenge 37 times before they got it. That's patience for you.
• They are so rude to each other/the taxi driver/the other teams.
• They stopped to help the other team who were struggling, knowing they would fall behind in the race. Lucky they still made it to the mat in time and aren't eliminated. 
• Crying gets you absolutely no where. 
• They are so friendly and helpful with each other and towards the other teams. They deserve to win that leg. 
• They lied and still won the leg. That's not fair. Tho check out how embarrassed they looked when they got caught out by the host of the show. 
• Even it takes forever to do the challenge, finish it well. Even if you're eliminated, it doesn't matter cos you tried your best.
• The man who couldn't swim kept getting all the water challenges and he still did them. How brave is he!
• Why does he never listen to her? She has good ideas. 
• Thank goodness they just finished the leg in time which is good as they had a hard time. 
• That's not fair. The other team should have won. They didn't play fair during the challenge. 

The list goes on. 

We've had such interesting conversation as a result of watching the show. 

We've all learned a lot, and it's been great family time in front of the TV on wet weekends. 

Watching last night's episode (we've recorded them), I mentioned to MissM that the challenge of making paper from cow dung in Sri Lanka was a great example of how animals and people work together in an environmentally friendly way. She replied 'that might be good to share for Exhibition'. 

That's my girl.

With friendship

x

Shopping Bags - The Memories

The humble plastic shopping bag was invented by a Swede in the early 1960's, and by 1965 there was a world wide patent for it. As we became more environmentally aware, shoppers started to look for alternatives and the paper bag revolution started, in all it's corporate glory and for a while, consumers were given a choice 'plastic or paper'. Only our grandmothers thought to take a string bag or shopping trolly with them to the shops. Younger generations were happy to bring home their shopping in paper or plastic bags - both to be recycled in various ways.

In the early 1980's countries started to limit, and ultimately ban plastic bags, phasing them out of circulation as consumers environmental awareness increased.

The demise of plastic bags was the birth of a new industry - corporate shopping bags (see main photo). There's also a plethora of products made from recycled plastic bags. Our school in Japan has school branded bags made from recycled plastic bags. Sadly our last one broke from years of use so I can't share a picture with you. It had the school logo on the outside pocket, and each bag was unique. There's cottage industries making carpets and rugs from recycled bags, jewellry and more.

We have been trained to keep our shopping bags in the back of the car so that they are always available to us. The thought of leaving them at home and having to ask for a bag (and pay for it) is very annoying, and it's curious the stares you get from other shoppers.

Some cashiers assume if you've no bag with you, you'll be carrying your goods home with you, as they don't even offer you a bag.

An upmarket supermarket in Motomochi we used to frequent in Yokohama had a poster-board groaning with photos of their 'shopping bag' in various places around the world. It was such a fun idea.

How E-N-O-R-M-O-U-S if my Costco freezer bag!? Like everything in the land of Costco, right? My first trip to this incredible land of super-sized groceries and everything else you could ever need was in Atlanta, Georgia over 20 years ago when I accompanied a friend there.

But I didn't buy my Costco bag in the US, I bought it in Japan.

Within a few weeks of landing, the first place my school mentor/buddy took me was, Costco as it sold as many 'western' (aka American) foodstuffs as Japanese. Now, being Australian, I wasn't that fussed about American brands, but her offer was thoughtful and off we went.

When I walked into the aeroplane hanger size shop, and saw the trough-sized shopping trolleys I knew I'd be in trouble (and I don't like shopping). We needed a LOT of stuff as we'd sold all our electrical before leaving Ireland, and our container wasn't due to arrive for several weeks.

Rice Cooker. Never used one before. Was told I NEEDED one, so into the trolley it went, along with a toaster, kettle, iron, hair dryer, hand beater, blender, small food processor ...... and then we hit the food isles.

I also have two massive Costco grocery bags which aren't photographed as it was only a small shop. But trust me, they are very long and hold a LOT of stuff.

But back to the bags.

The dainty light blue Marks and Spencers freezer bag was purchased in the UK, on a day I didn't intend to go supermarket shopping but ended up there with MrsW and didn't have a freezer bag. I don't do my main shop at M&S, but they do a great range of ready-to-eat nosh and good meat pies.

The black Tesco cloth bag isn't long for this world. It's tatty and has a hole in the bottom. This was also purchased while living in the UK. It'll be sad to see it go but there's Tesco here in Ireland so it's quickly replaced.

Finally, my favourite shop of all while living in the UK, The Good Life in Kings Worthy. Overflowing with home made foodstuffs, and a small, posh deli. The organic fruit shop and fantastic butcher. Fresh flowers and baking stuff. The bag's pretty too.


This tiny weeny little roll bag was bought in Yokohama at one of the incredible department stores. It was very inexpensive. It's light and compact. If you follow the fold lines, it's really easy to fold back to it's original shape. It's in my bag every day and comes on holidays with us for 'just in case purchases'. Surprisingly it holds quite a bit.

From compact roll ....... 

To great carry bag. 

Because we didn't have a car for the first year or so in Japan, and shopping is done pretty much on a daily basis, I invested in a trolly on wheels from Howards Storage (in Sydney, one of my most favourite shops. When folded down, it looked like a funky laptop bag. Mine was a bright green, but I quite like the dotty one.

Who knew I'd be pulling a trolly while walking to/from the shops?

What about corporate shopping bags? There are some fabulous brands investing in shopping bags as it's a continuum of their brand. Think Harrods, Sax of 5th Avenue, Selfridges and others.

Just HAD to buy one when I was there!

What girl doesn't want one of these little blue bags?
I've been fortunate to have received a few.

As I unpacked the shopping yesterday, for the first time it dawned on me, my shopping bags are a reflection of where we've lived and the range of shops frequented. Sadly I have no Australian shopping bags - must rectify that next visit home. I need a Coles, David Jones or Woolies bags.

I love seeing photos of where friend shop - souq's in the Middle East, colourful street markets in South East Asia, malls in America, underground shopping centres in Canada and more.

Yet they all have a few things in common, and one is the thing we use to carry our goods home in.

Isn't it funny how a simple shopping bag can emit so many memories.

How fortunate are we to shop this way. There are millions of people the world over who would love to be in a position to fill such oversized bags with quality food.

Do you have a favourite shopping bag?

What memories does it bring back?

THAT Conversation ..............

Most families with pre-teen age kids have some sort of bedtime routine. It's generally dinner, bath/shower, bed/read/lights out/sleep.

Depending on what time people (aka parents, older siblings) get home, there might be special time set aside for a chat about the days' events, or sharing a storybook.

Our routine with MissM has morphed from it being a shared parent job, to a G only job. I get a quick kiss and a hug before they go upstairs for 'Daddy Daughter Time' before lights out.

G was out last night. It had been ages since I'd done bedtime and I was looking forward to it, even suggesting we read a bit more of The Wishing Chair.  Little did I know what was about to happen.

She cleaned her teeth, got into bed, and gave me a hug but didn't let go. Now a long lingering hug from your child might not be a big deal for you, but it is for us. She leaves them for her daddy. I usually get short ones.

I melted into her small body, letting her hug get tighter, realising something wasn't right. Her hug was out of character, and while I was enjoying the affection, I had to ask 'what's up?'


I want to go 'home'. I'm tired of moving every 2- 3years, of being the new kid, of starting over, and making friends, loosing friends, living in different time zones to family and friends, missing out on being with her cousins, not really knowing her AuntyC and UncleS, of not being able to go away in the caravan with her grandparents, of not going to the ballet with her nana and CousinS, she has no idea how tall she is compared to CousinJ who has always been sooooo much taller than her, of not having sleepover with her godparents and god siblings, of being Australian but not knowing much about it, of not being able to choose the colour of the walls in my bedroom, or knowing where I'll finish school or who my friends will be, of having to sort through my toys and throw stuff out for the next time we move, of missing out on all the celebrations, of only seeing the people we love the most in the world for 2 weeks, TWO WEEKS isn't long enough! of having friends all over the world but not being able to see them or hang out together, I was a baby when we left and now I'm 10 people don't know me and I don't know them.

Her list was articulate, poignant and made complete sense.

I sat and listened while she talked as tears fell out of her eyes and rolled down her cheeks.

I nodded.

I agreed.

I held back the tears.

I hugged her tightly.

Then the questions started. This conversation was getting very serious and very grown up and I wasn't sure I was ready. Her articulation continued. She had obviously given this a LOT of thought.

Why did we have to leave?

Why can't we go back?

Why can't he find a new job there?

Why doesn't he want to go back?

Why can't we go there, and he keeps working somewhere else and visits?

Why can't we be normal and just live in the same place for ever?


I tried to answer each question calmly and in a way she would understand. We chatted about the friends we'd met, the places we'd visited, the things we've seen and done all because daddy' work takes us around the world.

So what, she said. I'd give up everything to be home in Sydney and never leave. Having all the experiences doesn't make up for not being with my family.

OMG - what do I say now? There's nothing I've read in any of the expat books that comes to mind. No conversations with other expat mums that might be helpful spring forth. Shit. Why's G out tonight of all nights? Where has all this bottled up stuff come from?

I summoned up the nerve to ask 'do you blame daddy for us living the life we live?' Thankfully she said no, he's a great daddy and she loves him but it is his job that takes us around the world, so maybe a little bit.

You never ask me what I think about a move.

Why don't you include me in the decisions? I reminded her we did ask her about school in Dublin before moving from the UK; we showed her photos of the house G had found (MissM and I saw it for the first time at the same time online). I explained as she gets older, she'll be more involved. Oh Ok she agreed. PHEW that was easy.

An hour had passed. It was after 9pm. How to calm her down enough for her to fall asleep? Do we dare continue the conversation on the weekend when there was time to indulge and explain? She kept going. I kept listening and answering as best I could.

Would you like to talk with Daddy about this on the weekend when we've time to sit'n'chat, you can ask all the questions you like and we can answer them. NO! Please don't make me tell him. I don't want to upset him. You can tell him, then we can talk if he wants she replied.

She calmed down. She agreed to try to sleep.

G came home not long after. I burst into tears. You can imagine his reaction. I told him everything. He grinned, which annoyed me no end.

She was still awake, and called out his name.

They talked.

He answered her questions the same as I did (yeah! imagine if it was a different response) why did we leave? why can't we go back to live? get a new job!

G pointed out that MissM and I are so much better at this expat stuff than he is - we are more sociable, friendlier, outgoing than he is; we encourage him out of the house to explore; we like new things ..... she smiled and agreed.

We talked about the incredible places we've been and the things we've seen. Dublin. Parts of Ireland. Paris. Copenhagen. Venice. Florence. Pisa. Rome. Budapest. Tokyo. Yokohama. Kyoto. Sapporo. Singapore. Hong Kong. Bangkok. London. And places in-between.

We giggled as we remembered friends from all over the world we've made, the funny times we shared with them and where they are now.

We also talked about living in Sydney and what that means - daddy having to find a new job, mummy more than likely going back to full time work, MissM having to go to before/after school care as a result, that CousinS and CousinJ are also at school and have commitments on weekends so we'd not see them that often even tho we'd live nearby; that no matter where you live, life becomes routine and normal and travel from Australia is very expensive and needs to be planned cos it's far away.

She wasn't buying a lot of our perceived benefits. She said quite simple, I'd give all that up in a second to spend a year with my cousins.

I had to leave the room. I was about to explode with emotion.

They hugged and chatted quietly for a while longer before she settled in his arms and he put her under the covers to sleep.

G and I chatted for hours .......

Oh the joys of expat parenting .......................

With friendship
x

You Ever Hear These Words From An Expat???????

Over the past few weeks I've heard words to describe expat life that might surprise you.

LONELY.

DIFFICULT.

ISOLATING.

FRUSTRATING.

COMPETITIVE.

BORING.

DISAPPOINTING.

TIME CONSUMING.

FINANCIALLY CRIPPLING.


And you thought it was all long lunches, heaps of travel on FFP, tennis lessons, volunteer work and a constant party with new friends.

The lady who described it as LONELY lived in the Middle East for several years. She and her husband decided that their kids would board in the UK. She flew back and forth every 6 weeks. Not really living in either place, but rather visiting. When she was with her husband, being an expat she missed her kids, and when she was 'home' in the UK she missed her husband. She felt she was in a constant no-win situation. She wasn't in the Middle East long enough to really settle in with a group of friends, everyone remained acquaintances. This was over 20 years ago. Maybe with Skype and Facebook it wouldn't have been so bad; maybe with more international schools the kids would have joined them. She said they all survived, and are a strong family unit but she remembers this time with sadness.

Some find it language FRUSTRATING. Forget not being able to understand what's going on around you (aka Yokohama), but conversing with other English speakers can be fraught with initial misunderstanding. There's American-English, British-English and Australian-English. One of the funniest misunderstandings is the word 'thong' - British-English it's a piece of ladies underwear, in Australian-English it's a summer shoe (aka flip flop). Poorly is not a financial status, but rather a state of wellness (being sick, not vomiting, but unwell).

Then there's spelling!

Check out this very short list of potential confusion and hilarity between different English speakers.

Aubergine, eggplant.
Corgette, zucchini.
Ketchup, tomato sauce.
Hard flour, soft flour, plain flour, self raising flour.
Push chair, pram, stroller, buggy.
Grade, year, form (school).
Rubber, eraser.
School bag, satchel, wheelie bag, back pack.

It can be DIFFICULT and FRUSTRATING not being able to find the ingredients to your families favourite meals, or having to find alternatives; putting on a constant brave face in front of the kids who haven't found a best friend at school yet; trying to work out time zones to Skype with family/friends back home; juggling travel opportunities with trips home, realising you are running a no charge B&B. The FINANCIAL cost of opening your home to guests (aka family and friends), going out'n'about with them is an unknown quantity and depends on where you are living and for how long in terms of it's attractiveness to visitors.

We've all lived in places that have been DIFFICULT to navigate - there's language, customs, cultural differences which resonates to shopping for food, going to the hairdressers, making a dinner reservation, finding child minders, employing reliable home help to name but a few day-to-day things that can be very TIME CONSUMING until you know where to go for the help you need. You waste a small fortune finding your way, buying foods you don't like, products you're not happy with, replacing electronic appliances and equipment because of the constant change of power sources.

Another lady in a different conversation talked of being LONELY. She explained she's always found making friends difficult. She doesn't like crowds, and doesn't enjoy 'starting over' every few years. She sees 'all you extroverts' and wants to run a mile the other direction. Her friends at home are those she's acquired and developed over y-e-a-r-s and they fulfil her. She doesn't want or need new ones, especially as they move often. She admitted if she knew her married life would be that of an expat wife, she might not have married her husband. (I found this comment so sad)

Some find it FRUSTRATING even tho we are currently in an English speaking country. The definition of words differ for an Australian, American, Canadian. Not being able to find the ingredients to your families favourite meals, or having to find alternatives; putting on a constant brave face in front of the kids who haven't found a best friend at school yet; trying to work out time zones to Skype with family/friends back home; juggling travel opportunities with trips home, realising you are running a no charge B&B.

Most expat families are single income families, not by choice but by immigration and visa status. Expat life can be FINANCIALLY CRIPPLING for some families. Long gone are the days when squillions is earned, mortgages are paid off, investment properties are purchased and more. The reason expat packages tend to cover school fees (international schools are ridiculously expensive, captured audience), sometimes rent (or part there-of) is because governments have already given away one job to a non-local, they are not going to do two.

Many ladies talk about giving up their jobs/careers to enable their husband/partner to accept the international move. it's a very patriarchal lifestyle. I had lunch with a friend who opened up about her career - she's several degrees including an MBA, she is invited all over the world to lecture (now I know why she's always 'away'), she's been a CEO of a private hospital and sat on 2 Boards. What a waste she isn't able to work!

There are a few house-dads, their wives are the one's with the contract. Their ISOLATION is ten-fold (another chat, another time)

A man I met last week in line at a Government office, spoke of his FRUSTRATION of not being able to find a suitable house for his young family as there's not much quality rental properties on the market and the rents they are asking are ridiculously expensive. His final decision to make-do with the best of what he saw isn't sitting well with him but he has to put on a brave face and stay strong for the sake of his wife and kids so that they love it! He wasn't able to get all his kids into the same school; the paperwork involved in bringing their family car from one EU country to another amongst other things. His wife and kids haven't moved here yet, so that's a whole other round of conversation.

He said going to work was so easy. He has a new respect for 'expat wives' (this is their 5th international move, but the first with kids)

It seems every midterm school break and term breaks requires a holiday to be taken. February one goes skiing (in some communities, February mid term is actually called 'ski break'), or flies to UAE for sunshine; the long summer break has people going 'home' for months on end, or having several mini trips back'n'forth. Whether you feel COMPETITIVE or not, being the one to stay-home can get very FRUSTRATING and LONELY.

You don't have to be a westerner living in Saudi, or SE Asia, we were Aussies living in the UK who found aspects of living Winchester Lonely, Difficult and Isolating. A new Irish friend was living in Hampshire for several years and felt similar. An American lady mentioned how totally isolated and out-of-place she felt in Sydney; and an American said Paris was awful for the first 3 years.

Funnily enough our time in Yokohama was the easiest! There was a huge support network offered by school that you experienced information OVERLOAD more than anything else. There were so many nationalities at school waiting to help you! The expats who found this environment difficult were those with quiet natures. We moved around in packs - convoys of cars went to Costco for bulk shopping; a day trip between school hours to IKEA (even if you didn't need anything), 'everyone' belonging to the same expat sports club; kids going to the same English-speaking ballet/tennis/swimming school. You couldn't help but trip over people you knew.

You can be lonely in a crowd, and expat life can be very busy and very lonely all at the same time.

So, that's the reality for some people.

How do you turn it around? How do you make it work?

For everyone who shared their negative stories, they all had positive outcomes to varying degrees admittedly. Here are some:


LONELY, ISOLATING
Join an American Women's Club or an International Women's Club. There are also various clubs for different nationalities - Google it.
In some cities there are expat clubs - check them out and join, and participate.
Research organisations/charities that need volunteers and sign up.
Enrol in a course you've been longing to do, tho not online. The idea is to be out'n'about.
Join the schools parents association or social groups.
Start a group - advertise at school, or at the local shops.
Share ideas via a Facebook group - in Yokohama we started a 'eating out' guide, and a 'holiday hangout' group where ideas were shared, get togethers were planned and friendships were made.
Open your home - host a pot luck lunch then ask someone to host the next months' get together; host a simple coffee morning class mums.

DIFFICULT. FRUSTRATING.
Sometimes this is as easy (hehehehe) as changing your attitude and simply accepting you are no longer in Kansas, Toto.
Accept the differences - otherwise you need to ask yourself why you are living where you are.
Be creative in finding solutions - ask others how the cope.
Find a confidente to talk with. Don't keep things bottled up, but don't dwell on things either.

COMPETITIVE.
No getting away from this, just try not to get caught up in it.
Maintain your families values and morals. You won't be living where you are for long, and you'll move. So keeping things constant within your family is vital.
Smile and be gracious (and have a bestie to bitch with)

BORING.
No such thing. Isn't that what we tell our kids?
Make Google your best friends - catch phrases like 'top 20 Free things to do with kids' or 'Free things to do' are a great start; sign up to any and all 'local' websites offering information ... after a while you'll learn which ones you like.
See ideas for Lonely. Isolating.

DISAPPOINTING.
Shame. Some moves just don't live up to your expectations. Keep in mind it won't last forever, set small milestones/goals and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Everyone who contributed to conversations that have ended up here know that with time, patience and a bit of effort, THINGS GET BETTER.  They have to, otherwise we'd all go home.

G and I try to keep a balance with MissM. Expat life is what you make it. We try to keep it real. We acknowledge the good bits and the not-so-good bits. We arrive with a thud! and assimilate as best we can as quickly as we can, without stepping on too many toes. We love having people stay with us, we love learning about our new home and experiencing new cultures. We make HOME where ever we are, for however long we are there.

With friendship,
x

It's Our Anniversary

an·ni·ver·sa·ry

ˌanəˈvərs(ə)rē/

noun

1. the date on which an event took place in a previous year.

   "the 50th anniversary of the start of World War II"

   • the date on which a country or other institution was founded in a previous year.

     "Canada's 125th anniversary"
   • the date on which a couple was married in a previous year.

     "he even forgot our tenth anniversary!"

Today is our 9th anniversary being expats. G laughed when it was mentioned. He's not quite sure why it's a date I remember every-single-year, tho when reminded him of the definition of the word and he simply said, oh ok then.

We left on Qantas flight 11 on January 5th for Dublin with a two night stop over in Los Angeles to stretch our legs. We had a day at Disneyland, and time by the pool. MissM was two and a half and slept all the way (we medicated her as it was her first overseas flight and she was so tiny). Love looking at the album photos! She was so tiny. We were much slimmer.

We had no idea what we were doing, but were very prepared to give it a go, and see what happened. After all, we only had a two year signed contract! If we didn't like it, we'd go home.

What's happened has been amazing for so many reasons.

Nine years. 4 international moves (plus two unplanned stints in Sydney) means MissMs been to 5 schools, each with it's own cirriculum challenges. I experience the same feeling every time she has a first day - we're sending her off into the unknown and expect her to make friends, be happy and enjoy school. So far, we've been bloody lucky that's happened!

She's worn uniforms and worn casual clothes. She's had school lunches provided, and home made lunches; she's had huge grounds to play in and tiny concrete areas on which to make the most of playtime. Each time, she's made friends and settled well and been happy. What more could we ask?

Lessons Learned: Our daughter is a very kind, caring, resourceful, adaptable, creative, strong, considerate, independent, charismatic kid. If these qualities stay with her she'll be an awesome adult. I've learnt that it's difficult at times to raise a child without support from extended family and that a support network is vital to a parents sanity. My admiration for people who are doing this alone for whatever reason is 10-fold! As soon as you know you 'might' be moving, check out the schools and make enquiries about available places. If you're lucky to have a choice of schools, GO SEE THEM and ask questions, make sure it's a good fit for your child/ren; don't accept a position just because it's offered (tho sometimes you don't have a choice); it does get more complicated as they get older in terms of continuity of subjects, teaching styles, adapting learning styles, friendships but it will all work out! Depending on the age of your kids, get involved in the parents groups, volunteer  - tho remember not all schools function this way, so ASK first. It's OK to buy second hand uniforms, bags, text books etc. Allow the kids to take time to fit in and navigate their way - it's the same as your first day in the new office. It all takes time. As the kids get older, it reduces the opportunity to be involved with school thereby reducing mums social network opportunities. 

We've met so many generous, funny people along the way. Made lifelong friends in a matter of months. Expat life moves fast! You never know when you or they will be moving on, so you have to make the time you have count.

Lessons Learned: Sometimes you have to let people go, or they choose to let you go and you know what, it's never personal as ironic as that sounds. I've learnt that the crowd you're IN with is your crowd and not to be bothered by the other crowds. That you really don't need a lot of friends, you just need a few good ones - people to laugh with, cry with, explore with, and to confide in. I've learnt that the saying 'never judge a book by it's cover' is so wrong! If I did that with people I'd met these past 9 years, I'd have missed out on some of the most unique friendships that have come my way. I've learn to be quiet(er) in certain social situations, to let others have their say/their way, to keep some personal things secret, people don't need to know everything about you (the beauty of expat life is you get to do-over regularly). Be slow to trust others and be quick to be trusted. Listen more than talk (don't laugh, it's true!) and be respectful of differences, great friendships can happen if you let them. Remember, there is much truth in six degrees of separation, especially with Facebook! Be open to meeting a friend of a friend whose just moved to your city, or is about to move to where you've lived. The common factors might just allow a new friendship to grow. Join the local International Womens' Club ( or similar), investigate volunteer roles at school or with local charities - keep busy! Sign up to a course, continue a hobby or sport. 

The world is an amazing place.  Cultural differences are to be celebrated. Each city we've called home has offered us different perspectives and interests.

Lessons Learned: We actually enjoy travelling and sight seeing. G and MissM, once out of the house are great explorers, even tho we have different tastes, we make it work. Our suitcase packing skills have vastly improved, and we manage with less. We love planning and researching trips. We're great in planes, trains and cars. We're terrific walkers when on holidays, and can go into chillaxing mode with the click of a finger. We don't do hot'n'humid very well, tho we do enjoy a pool-resort vacation. Include the child/ren in planning what to do/see on vacation. Mix up the days so everyone's tastes are taken into account. Take lots of photos and make albums of the best ones and write little stories so you remember the good-funny and not so good times of the trip. As the kids grow older, or you repatriate, you'll relish these memories.

We had no idea we'd be unofficially running a B&B. We love having guests stay with us, and showing them around our new home. We can indulge ourselves with friends much more this way and genuinely catch up even if it's a 48 hour visit. The more bedrooms we can offer friends the better.Our happiest times in Winchester were when all 3 guest bedrooms were full. Even now, we can sleep an extra 5 people (two on the sofa bed, one on a single bed, and two in the guests bedroom). It's a great excuse for us to do local sight seeing that we might otherwise not do.

Lessons Learned: always provide guests with a prepaid mobile phone with important mobile phone numbers already in the contacts (yours, the house phone, taxi, hospital, GP, and one or two reliable friends in case you are uncontactable for some reason); always ask friends if they have any dietary requirements you may not be aware of (a cousin informed me she was a vegetarian two days before arriving for a week - there went my menu planning!); precook and freeze as many meals as possible so you're not slaving over the stove/hob their entire visit; if you can, rent a TV for their bedroom as a means of offering them private time; give them your WIFI passwords when they arrive; keep to your kids routine as much as possible or the kids think that yo have guests, they get a day off school; don't be shy in asking guests to catch coach (or similar) to a closer destination to you than the airport, saving time and money; learn to say 'no' if you really prefer people not stay with you. Alternatively  if you offer a sleepover, be prepared for the person to phone one day and say they are coming for a visit! Have everyone who stays sign a guests book - they are one of the most treasured possessions we have. 

Food and Festivals. Local culture. As nowhere is quite like 'home' everywhere is exciting! For us, our time in Japan has been the most eye opening simply because our cultural differences. Being part of an International School added another invaluable dimension to our experiences.

Lessons Learned: Participate in every single thing that you can - Google search the event beforehand so you have an idea what's going on, ask questions when you're there, take photos, be as open minded as you possibly can and that includes ALL your senses. Say yes to invitations. Find out what events are 'annual' and when they occur and plan to participate; if you miss out one year, make sure you make a note in your diary for the next year! Enjoy getting lost - you find the most incredible things. Catch a train or bus to the end of the line, or pick a stop and get off and walk around; there's so much information online to Google, or lookup on trip advisor, or read DK travel books, or Lonely Planet. No excuses for being bored, or missing out. 

It's you and him and the kids; you are a tight knit family unit who face the world, literally, as a team. You land in a new city, calling it home knowing only each other (maybe a few other people but not often), and have to 'start over' establishing friendships, creating a life, exploring and learning to live day to day in a new environment. Strong marriages! If, when things go wrong, you've each other to lean on, tho how much honesty you share with one another is a huge question. Does He really need to know how miserable you are? Will it make a difference to the contract? If SHE knows the job isn't what I thought it would be and I hate it, will that make her nervous about moving? If SHE's bored batty, her days too long and unfulfilling how does she get the energy to 'pretend' its fine, so she remains interesting to her employed husband? Too many marriages breakdown in expat life .... if they were 'home' would they have survived?

Lessons Learned: No matter what, find a way to be honest with each other. Secrets get you into trouble. Make sure you can look each other straight in the eye and say 'Despite doing my very best at <><><><, I <><><><' and begin a conversation. Get help - see a councillor together or individually if need be; ask a friend to have the child/ren for a night and get away for a break; have regular DATE NIGHTS (I cannot stress this one enough!). If you can't find a sitter ask a friend and repay the favour (babysitting or childminding clubs are popular amongst expats depending on where you live); See, none of this is unique to expat couples! What is difficult at times is the total reliance on each other for stuff, as there's no extended family or uber close knit circle of friends to support/help/talk thru things with. Never go to bed on an argument, and never leave the house angry. Always kiss each other goodbye and hello. 


Talking of missing out, we have missed out on stuff. So much going on at home in Sydney with family and friends. Obviously if MissM was only two and a half when we left, so was our nephew and our niece was 6; we've missed out on birthdays, school concerts, picnics, hanging out, growing closer, sharing secrets and more. Time we'll never get back. Time that Skye doesn't allow to happen. Friendships also need to be cared for and invested in; people's lives get busy and let's face it, our day to day is here and theirs is there, so you can't be part of it.

Lessons Learned: Make the most of the time you do have together; embrace technology as your friend, don't let time slip by cos you're busy or time zones don't meet up; post a card every so often, send a small gift; Friendships also need to be cared for and invested in; people's lives get busy and let's face it, our day to day is here and theirs is there, so you can't be part of it. Don't let the distance or absence eat you up - it's not worth the stress.

For a lot of expats, that hardest relationship to navigate is that with our parents. None of us are getting any younger; siblings who are close by are the ones to support and comfort aging parents, depending on situations a trip home several times a year isn't feasible but we'll all make the trip if a parent or sibling is diagnosed unwell, or worse. A disagreement over Skype or email is blown out of proportions as opposed to it happening 'in person'.

Lessons Learned: Gosh, I'm not so sure about this one. Call, Skype, email, Facebook often; never finish contact on a negative note; don't share the ins'n'outs of any sad or negative situations cos they can't do anything about it miles away, nor do they really understand your perspective and they only dwell on it while you've moved on (guess the same goes for their news); do share important stuff if someone's unwell, or achieved something great; don't bang on too much about what you're doing and where you're going as sometimes expats come off as a tad spoilt or indulged; ask questions, share light news; expat life is pretty normal and can be mundane, it can also be hugely exciting so be careful to balance conversation. Other than that, love to hear your lessons ..... I still feel I fail miserably with this one. 

I've also learnt:

• We don't NEED a car, but having one makes things easier.
• The are very few genuine global brands.
• Words might sound the same, but have completely different meanings, so check!
• Libraries and/or Kindle are a great way to indulge one's love of reading without the weight of books.
• Just cos you can see it online doesn't mean the company delivers to your country/area. 
• PayTV offers you hundreds of channels, most of them are rubbish. 
• Balance your news - CNN isn't always the one to watch. 
• Keeping in touch with news from home online helps to converse with family and friends. 
• Never ending days of social isolation (for some) is dangerous as it affords the mind time to think.
• Learn to ask questions - about anything! Good conversation starter, plus you learn stuff. 
• Let your Embassy know you are newly arrived, especially in countries that have natural disasters like earthquakes. Just makes it easier IF something happens. 
• Better to have a wardrobe of 'transeasonal clothing' than specific seasons as it lasts longer in more countries. 
• Invest in a good coat, warm boots, colourful hats/gloves and scarves when living in colder climates. Everywhere's heated so you don't need to overdress. 
• Find a good hairdresser, doctor and babysitter as quickly as you can by asking for recommendations. 
• Don't share your babysitter!
• Accept that everywhere is different, and what you did in one place with one group may not be how it is in another. 
• Keep busy, even if it means going to a movie in the middle of the day on your own. 

I'm sure there are more ...................

We hope when we share our Adventures we do it with humility and consideration and don't bore people. We aim to be the best hosts we can be when we have guests, and that we make as most of the opportunities afforded us.

Are we the same as when we left? Well, is anyone the same as they were 9 years ago? We're basically the same, just a bit older, chubbier, with a few more experiences, lots more friends, and great memories. .

Being an expat is bittersweet but it's the life we live, and while we've no idea what the future brings, we'll continue to enjoy it and get back to Sydney as often as we can.

So, Happy Anniversary G, love you.

What lessons have you learnt since being an expat, or living 'away' from home?

If you've not moved, what would you like those who have to know?

Do you acknowledge when you started your Adventure?

Purging or Keeping?

Yeah, yeah, it's winter in Ireland but a WINTER CLEAN doesn't sound quite the same, does it?

It's also the NEW YEAR. A time for do-overs, resolutions, fresh starts and what better way to do this than with none other than the help of Peter Walsh.

I love Peter Walsh, an Australian-made-good in the UK with the help of Oprah. He's the neat-freak, the guy who helps disorganised people get organised. His Facebook page is full of tips, several of which I have not only done, but maintain to this day.

His annual 31 Days to Get Organised started on January 1 and it encouraged me to have a look around our place and see what might benefit from a New Year Spring Clean. If you've not heard of Peter, or seen his Challenge, I encourage you to do so.

First things first, as we were enjoying a staycation over the Christmas/NY break, it allowed us the opportunity to take stuff to the Clubs storage unit that should have been gone months ago. I needed G's help as two of the storage buckets were too heavy for me and not worth me aggravating my back. It was a really good feeling just knowing the 3 buckets of stuff where no longer in the garage, and the bag and extra bucket were no longer taking up space in the sitting room. (Prior to taking them to the storage unit, I typed up a label for the outside of each box detailing it's contents for ease of reference in the future.)

With this feeling of accomplishment I was spurred on to look around and see what we no longer need, or use. G was around to help take things to the recycle centre, or tip, or to reorganise things if needed.

I had a cupboard full of empty jars which I occasionally use as vases for fresh flowers. I was going to glue them in small groups and sell them as mini-geometric vases at the Bazaar the Club held, but never got around to it. The amount of useless jars annoyed G even tho the cupboard was seldom opened.  Realising I was never going to make the mini-geometric vases, all but 7 were put into the recycling bin. Too easy.

NEXT ..................................

The attic. The place where things get put when not immediately needed anymore, or not at all.

Encouraging G to come up and help with the decision of what to keep was futile. So it was left to moi.

I LOVE having at attic to store stuff. We had the garage when I was growing up. Anything you wanted to keep, but didn't use went into the garage. Every few months, we'd have a family tidy of the garage, reorganising what we wanted to keep, and throwing out the things we realised we didn't really want/need long term. Stuff still get's put into the garage! Even tho we've not lived with mum for years, and Dad passeed away even longer ago, things still go into the garage, and my brother is asked to go over every few months and help her 'go thru stuff'. It 's a standing joke with my brother and I.

Our attic has very useful stuff stored. All our luggage is there plus envelopes full of loose change in various currencies, and any other items we require when travelling (neck pillows, various adaptors, toiletries bags etc), the stuff that's needed once a year, (Christmas, Chanukah, Passover, Halloween, Easter), umbrella for outdoor table setting, snow sleds,  picnic basket and chairs ...... all fairly normal stuff that families have that need to go somewhere.

We also have lots of other stuff in our attic. Our dining room table/chairs (there was one in the house, so we kept ours packed), a couple of boxes of kitchen things (the kitchen here was stocked with pots'n'pans), numerous empty boxes to house electrical products and ornaments when we are on the move again (keeps the items safer, tho the empty boxes take up room between moves),  and MissM's baby stuff.

My biggest issue at the moment is what to do with several storage boxes of MissM's early toddler year stuff. Stuff that is carefully wrapped and put 'away' for when she has a baby; stunning pop up books, her favourite musical toys, several stuffed toys and other items given to her on those precious first few birthdays and Christmas', baby clothes (some of which have found their way onto her dolls), ornaments, pillows etc.

So many wonderful warm emotions took over me as I looked at them yesterday. I sincerely hope MissM has the same experience when she touches them in years to come. How horrible to go thru all this drama for her to ask 'why on earth did Mum keep this????????'

If we were normal, and didn't move countries every 2-3 years, we'd put all this stuff (and more probably) in the attic, or under the house, or, in the garage and ignore it!

MissM has enjoyed played with my dolls pram, has my very first proper doll, Carrie on her memory table, snuggles up with my stuffed cat Chi-Chi, and reads my first hard cover Winne The Pooh book.

Maybe I am keeping too much of her stuff?

We don't have the choice of keeping 'stuff in the garage' and it would be so easy to sell, or give away most of the things, but part of me won't allow that to happen.  I've decided to find out how much it will cost to ship two boxes back to Sydney to store in Mums garage (ironic, eh?) till our next visit when we will go thru our storage unit (we have half a household packed away for the past 8 years, reckon 90% will get chucked) and add it to the remaining items.

Part of the reason we can't simply hold onto stuff like most people, is that we are limited to a specific amount of container space with our moves, and we are currently 9 cubic metres OVER! Now, we can identify every centimetre of space without a problem as there's several items we purchased in the UK e.g.: trampoline, outdoor table setting/umbrella, Ikebana bits'n'pieces, a few new paintings. We also moved with a full compliment of electrical equipment (we tend to sell all of this as we move from different power strengths) so 'loosing' 9 cubic metres won't be too hard.

Peter Walshe's encouragement to Get Organisined coupled with my subconscious need to reduce our stuff by 9 cubic metres has come down to things like throwing out old pillows, repacking the Christmas decorations in a more orderly fashion (reduced boxes by two!), donating leftover Christmas paper/cards/unwanted decorations to charity, accepting that buying 3 plastic sleds to play in the snow in the UK was ridiculous. We'll probably leave the outdoor table setting and chairs when we move on to our next Adventure, as well as the trampoline (not sure it would cope being pulled down and built again), MissM will probably not want/need as many toys'n'games as she's entering tween-hood and is playing differently, we've all got clothes and shoes we don't wear!

I love a good purge!

It not only frees up physical space, it affects our emotions too.

Donating stuff to charity is a good thing, as is recycling.

One thing expat life has taught me, none of us need all the material stuff we hang onto. If you haven't seen Peter Walshes video yet, you should. You might just find yourself looking inside your cupboard and drawers differently.

With friendship
x

What's in your garage/attic/basement?

Do expats over compensate for their kids moving around by

keeping material things i.e.: memories from their 'past'? 

How often do you Spring Clean?

Which of Peter Walshe's Challenges attracted you? WHY?

Chanukah - Festival of Light

Opps. Somehow forgot to post this blog at the appropriate time.




Chanukah is a lovely time of the year.

It lasts 8 nights and has it's foundation firmly planted around family and being together. Every Jewish family the world over will do the same thing over Chanukah. It's an interesting concept, to be so in sync with others.

The story goes, Israel was ruled by people who prayed to many gods. At first, they let the Jewish people pray to their own god as they believed in only one god. A new king came to power, and he ordered the Jewish people to pray to his gods, and took over their temple.

Mattathias got very angry about this and gathered an army to fight the king. The leader of the army was Judah the Maccabee who became very famous in Jewish lore.

After years of fighting the Jews won, but it was bittersweet as their temple had been invaded and filled with idols they didn't recognise. There Torah (Bible) was gone. The Menorah, the 8-branched candleholder which should always be lit was gone.

They searched for both important items and eventually found the Menorah, with all but a small amount of the anointed oil remaining, enough for maybe one day. It would take the scholars at least a week to make more supplies.

They lit the oil, and the flames on the Menorah shone brightly for all to see.

It burned a second day.

Then the next and a 4th, and a 5th.

The flames burned for 8 full days, miraculously all the time needed to have a fresh supply of oil.

From that year on, Jewish people the world over light the Menorah, one candle a night, until all 8 candles are lit.


The candles are lit right to left.

The first candle to be lit is the SHAMMAS, or the servant candle to the others. The Shammas then lights each candle at dusk for eight consecutive nights.

It is customary to have the Menorah lit in the part of the home where they can be seen from outside as  a welcome sign to anyone passing.

Other traditions are to eat lots of food cooked in oil. Donuts are a family favourite, as are potato latkes and schnitzel.

While Christmas has become a very decorative festival, with the tree and all its ornaments, fake snow on windows, gel stickers, external house lights of all shapes and sizes, Christmas jumpers, Santa hats and more, Chanukah just has the Menorah.

Some families adopted a gift giving aspect to Chanukah, giving the kids a small gift on each night of Chanukah. It was a compromise and 'allowed' Jewish people to feel they could participate in a small way the Christmas spirit of gift giving/receiving.

Our family has never exchanged Chanukah gifts, and it never bothered us that I remember. I admit to feeling a wee bit guilty about being away from 'home' at this time of year, and indulge MissM with 8 Chanukah treats. Also, and it might sound silly, as we celebrate 'everything' I'm conscious of not having one festival (if that's what you call it) out-do another. There has to be balance in all things (I know, I'm pathetic)

We celebrate Christmas with our non-Jewish friends, and Chanukah with our family and Jewish friends. As I got older, 'everyone' did 'everything' something we do to this day. In fact, a cousin living in the UK wished the family on our secret group on FB 'merry christmas' and I made the remark, funny no one bothered with Chanukah wishes to which another cousin replied, Chunukah Schmanukah. Everyone knows Christmas is where its' at. (Bet his parents are pleased with the thousands of dollars invested in his Jewish education)

Maybe he's right.

It's all one big holiday-gift giving blur.

MissM likes it when I go into school with our Menorahs and dreidles and explain Chanukah to her friends.

Dreidle.

Like all the memories hanging on our Christmas tree, our Menorahs are very special too.

One belonged to my late fathers sister, who I adored. After she passed away, my cousin (her son) inherited it. When we left Sydney for Ireland, he gave me a plain wrapped parcel and said I was not to open it til we arrived in Dublin. Of course, I opened it the minute he left the apartment. There inside was my aunts Menorah. I'm crying even writing this.

The YEARS of memories she and my uncle would have shared with their 4 sons, my first cousins and the family are wrapt up in the 8 arms of the Menorah. We use it every year, pride of place in our home.

It's a constant symbol of family for us. MissM knows the story; G respects it.

We've shared Chanukah with family at picnics in a park, over a BBQ at someone's home, and on a beach at a cousins house. Seeing ALL the Menorahs in a row, lit at the same time was very special. I hope that everyone continues it, especially as there are little people around again.

When my brother, SIL and the kids visited us in the UK, it was very emotional to see the 3 kids lighting candles together. Aunty Anna would have been smiling on all of us.

The other was a gift from G's sister. She bought it for us on her first overseas trip in Murano, Italy. As we had moved to Ireland while she was overseas, she added us to her stop overs before flying back to Sydney. She knew we had one, and wanted this one to be MissM's

One day, MissM will have both the Menorah out at Chunukah, and light the candles, one at a time, in her own home, and remember all places she's lived, and all the friends that shared the evenings with us and smile.

It'll be next to the Christmas tree overflowing with ornaments from all the places she's lived, and all the friends that shared the evening with us and smile.

TRADITIONS.

Gotta love 'em.

How do you celebrate at this time of year?

What family traditions do you hope your kids will continue?

What 'things' instantly bring memories flooding back?

The Tree Is Up

Are you a real tree family or prefer the decorative plastic kind?

Maybe the more correct initial question should be do you celebrate Christmas, and if you do, HOW do you?

We 'do' Christmas and Chanukah. We have a tree and all the trimmings, but we don't go to church. We light the Menorah and play with dreidles, but don't go to Synagogue (tho I did as a child).
MissM participates in the school Carol Service, and we love going to hear the kids sing, but we don't participate in the religious aspects of the service.

It surprised me then, that a few ladies didn't participate in the Christmas Lunch last week because they 'don't celebrate Christmas'.  I still find that hard to understand ...... Diwali isn't my festival, but invite me along to participate or observe and I'm there!!!!!!!!! Chinese New Year, Japanese New Year,  SinterKlaus you name it. What's the point of living in a multi-cultural society if not to participate in different celebrations, especially when invited to? It's not a judgmental thing, just a why-not thing.

MissM's school in Winchester and here in Dublin have Carol Services in the local Church. In Winchester, it was a private service in Winchester Cathedral! How exciting!!!!!!!!!!!! We don't participate in the religious aspects of the service, but we respectfully stand when asked. It was a wonderful experience, even if we didn't get the full meaning of the service.

We didn't celebrate Christmas as kids; I don't feel like I missed out on anything. It just wasn't done in our home but we did celebrate it with friends. Love a good Christmas Carol.

Like a lot of people, the true meaning of Christmas, and Easter has been lost to companies like Hallmark and retailers. There's a competition in the air to have the best decorated house, or be invited to the most parties. And do not get me started on the stress associated with the right gifts for people.

You can probably gather I'm not religious, tho even I get angry at the lack of spiritual and the huge amount of material this time brings. Several close friends are religious, and this is a very important time of year for them. It's always very touching to be invited to share time with them and their families over this period, and we relish the opportunity to do so.

But I digress.

The TREE is the topic of conversation.

Our very first real Christmas Tree is up and decorated. The plastic one which we have decorated every year since MissM was born, bar one (it was still on the boat coming over to Japan from Ireland) is still in it's box in the attic.

We started to focus on tree decorations when MissM was born. I bought G one that said 'Daddy 2004' and MissM one with her name on it and 2004. Didn't think to buy one for myself with Mummy 2004 .... so when MissM went to hang all 3 together this morning she was surprised there were only two. When I explained why, she said, typical. Not really sure what that meant, and didn't ask.

If we've been chatting together for a while you know we left Sydney for Dublin in 2006. We had 2 fabulous years there. Made a lot of friends and a few really good ones who we are still in touch with and see when travel plans allow. Taking their gift decorations out of their boxes always takes time as we reminisce. 

I bought this stunning bauble (above) from Waterford Glass factory when Mum and I toured there. Along with all the sparkly silver Newbridge ornaments, it's a favourite from 'the first time we were here'.

From Dublin we moved to Yokohama. While Japan doesn't celebrate Christmas (generally speaking), the Japanese fully adopt and LOVE any thing to do with a party, decorations, and gift giving/receiving, so Christmas in Japan was as festive as ever, without the religious aspects on display.

We had a Christmas craft fair at school as a fundraiser and some of the creative Japanese ladies made these amazing baubles from pieces of Washi Paper. They also decorated eggs with Washi Paper.

From Yokohama, we moved to Winchester, UK. Winchester was the capital of England, and Winchester Cathedral is the centrepiece of the city and Christmas. The Christmas Markets are held in the Close, around an ice skating rink. We had a great Christmas when my brother, SIL and kids joined us from Sydney.

Not sure if these are supposed to be on the tree, but that's where we have them, alongside an London Bobby (policeman), a Royal Guard from Buckingham Palace, a London telephone box, and a double decker bus, along with the Harrods green shopping bag and Bear (which I bought in 2006 on my first visit to London with MsJH).

The other wonderful thing about our tree is that each year SIL buys MissM and I an ornament, and I buy her and the kids one each. I always try to make ours something memorable from our travels, while they choose to do a Sydney/Aussie theme or a ballet theme (for MissM). One day, each child will be able to hang their ornaments on their own tree. It'll have to be a huge one for all the decorations they'll have collected by then.

We also hang our wreath, a gift from Mr & MrsH and family. It arrived as part of a HUGE Christmas hamper one year and we treat it with kid-gloves so it lasts.

And that's how traditions are borne, and continued.

They keep us rooted to where we're from, and where we've been.

We look forward to December every year for all of the above reasons.

For all the Christmas' past, and all the Christmas' to come.

What's hanging on your tree?

What special memories are there?

What traditions have you adopted from friends or places you've lived?

If you don't celebrate Christmas, what do you do at this time of year?